Becoming What You Hate

So. I'm one of those people, now. You know THOSE people. The people I couldn't stand back when I was in beginning ballet class twice a week. The more advanced dancer who is taking the level 1-2 class for unfathomable reasons, taking up valuable space in an overcrowded studio, and the worst is yet to come... wearing pointe shoes. UGH. Four years ago I could NOT understand those people. Those people made no sense to me. They were operating on some set of rules that didn't work in my brain. Now? I am those people. Why? Because, due to scheduling and health restrictions I am stuck taking the most overcrowded 1-2 class once a week just to get my class number up high enough to qualify for the more advanced stuff. And why am I wearing pointes? Because this class goes really freaking slow, guys. I might as well get some of the strength back in my arches while I am doing painfully slow tendus at the barre.

Your Shoes Are Killing My Spirit

So... what is the thing with wearing pointe shoes to beginning ballet class? There are three ladies (out of about 14-15 some nights) in my class that are wearing pointe shoes, now. One has them deshanked that I know of, and says she is wearing them to build up foot strength without going up in them. One girl is definitely wearing those things as is, because she is Showing Off before class (I am not saying that in a snarky way. If you've got it, babe, flaunt it). The other... I am not sure because I don't pay much attention to what other people are doing in class to be honest (I just always notice that they are Super Candy Pink). It's all focusing on keeping my own sorry butt from falling over.
Anyway. I was just wondering what is up with that.
I think, if I had pointe shoes that were fully functional I would probably be too careful of them in a regular class. Not want to go in to demi pointe too much because I would not want the shanks to get broken before their time had come.
Also, I want my future first pointe shoe purchase to be The Event Of The Season. With maybe a glass of (pink!) champagne afterward and blurry iphone photos posted to facebook with comments like "HOLY SH*T LOOK AT WHAT I JUST BOUGHT GUYS I AM A SUPER TWIRLY BALLERINA NOW OMG"
But, anyway. That is just me.

Ain't Nobody Lookin' At You

I'm naturally deeply self conscious. I am not pretty, which is probably a good thing because I would just spend all day looking at myself in the mirror if I was. The point is that adults taking ballet classes are super self conscious because they feel old and lumpy and uncoordinated and much less graceful than the image of balletic perfection in their heads.
Which is the only explanation I can come up with for the fact that most people refuse to wear a leotard without at least a skirt or shorts to cover up with. And a sweater, sometimes. It is WAY too freakin' hot in the studio for me to deal with all those extra layers so I am often the only person in class (there were 13 students tonight!) who is wearing the standard ballet "uniform" of pink tights and shoes, black leo, and nothing else. Aw man. I love clothes. I love dress up. I love having hobbies with accessories and shoes and special things to wear. It's fun! Come on ladies! Step up to it!
Face it, even when we feel extra junky about our body the simple fact is that no one is paying any attention to you because they are focused on what they are doing. Like, no matter how many times tonight I wanted to see what the lady in the deshanked pointe shoes was doing in releve sous-sus, I was too busy getting myself up there to check on anyone else!

The Camo is the Important Part